Often, on social occasions when you have to face people with contradictory beliefs to yours, the most demanding part of communication is to manage the anger that these occasions may cause, and move through it in order to have a productive discussion.
The Mayo Clinic, who deals with such issues, explains the necessity of anger management in the following way: “Anger management is the process of learning to recognize signs that you’re becoming angry. The purpsoe is to calm down and deal with the situation in a positive way. Anger management doesn’t try to keep you from feeling anger or encourage you to hold it in. Anger is a normal, healthy emotion when you know how to express it appropriately. Anger management is about learning how to do this.”
If you are a person who has difficulties managing this anger, the following tricks may prove helpful on such occasions.
First: identify a possible outlet.
Try to understand what makes you angry and how you could work around the cause of anger. Find a solution, while breathing deeply and trying to calm down.
Second: forgive! And, if you can, forget.
This is probably the greatest bet. Keeping the anger inside will only reproduce the resentment. Forgiving will teach you a great lesson, that no one should be allowed to influence your state of mind.
Third: Learn to listen.
If you are a good listener, a feeling of empathy is created that works against the anger. An active listener allows a conversation to move away from anger and towards productive communication.
Fourth: practice relaxation.
Relaxation techniques, when well practice, tackle the physical effects of anger. Breathing is the most important part. If you learn to breathe from your diaphragm, the rest will follow right away.
Fifth: cognitive restructuring.
This method means to change the way you process a situation when angry. Make a conscious attempt to change the way you think about a situation that makes you angry, and soon such a way of thinking will become naturalised.
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