“If I ever loved a woman, the more I loved her, the more I wanted to hurt her. Frida was only the most obvious victim of this disgusting trait.” ~ Diego Rivera
I love someone and I know you must love someone too. If you’re a man, then you love her, some her, somewhere, right? Well, if you do, then don’t destroy her in the process.
There’s a thin line, between love and many other things, including hate.
I get it. This means the hurt is right there in the mix.
Here, let me show you. I’m going to run down a few things you need to remember. Hang out, it’s going to be choppy and fast, but it will get my point across none-the-less.
Bring awareness to your love for her.
This fortifies the relationship like you wouldn’t imagine. And strength is something you need in this world today to love in the correct manner.
Remember how she was when you first met, how she looked, talked and moved.
If she was wild, then appreciate that and don’t try to change her. After all, you chose her, the way she was and not the way she could be. Point taken?
Keep her complete, and understand a tricky idea that will set both of you free. While she is strong, yes indeed, she still depends on how you think of her, to strengthen her identity. IT’s not that she can’t do it on her own, she just shouldn’t have to. Bet you’ve heard that one before, huh.
Please don’t destroy her if you love her, okay?
She’s been destroyed before you know, beaten down and spat upon in the dirt. She’s experienced degradation like you could never fathom, so don’t repeat this. I really don’t think this is what she’s looking for.
And her book, you may have read it but you didn’t.
There is so much more to her than what you know now. Even after years of learning, you will never truly get the whole picture of how layered and beautifully complicated she is.
And don’t Be absent.
I don’t’ just mean physically absent. I also speak of emotional absence, where you are there but not there. Yeah, she noticed the difference.
And don’t NEED her, WANT her.
She will even be destroyed if she feels your love is not important to share at all moment, and not just when you’re lonely. Don’t love her so she can heal you either. She will, but don’t search it out.
As for her, your love and patience matter, but she doesn’t need to be saved, okay?
And don’t look for perfection either. If she is broken, love all those pieces completely. Because who she sees in the mirror is who she wants you to love. IF you don’t, you will destroy her.
All the effort you provide, she will do twice that much.
If you love her, she will love you more.
I appreciate this article… and can’t disagree with much of this advice. I WILL say though… A true woman can’t BE destroyed by whether or not someone is/was in love with her. No matter WHAT the partner did or said. The internal strength that is found throughout the process of a relationship gone sour… will strengthen her even more (if she allows.) You can’t break water 😉
Men AND women need to recognize the responsibility and role they play to a significant other and how words and actions can break a human spirit… and for THAT, I thank you for this article. There was a lot I kept nodding my head and being grateful someone was talking about. Hopefully… those men who need to see it will see it 🙂